sometimes, it really does hurt instead.

for the first time in a long time I cried my heart out to God tonight, and during the time, it felt absolutely horrible. but now, it feels absolutely wonderful. I cried out everything I've been feeling in the past six months to a year, and I just kept going.

I read somewhere sometime that crying isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign that you've been strong for too long. I thoroughly believe this is true.

once and a while, it just feels good to cry. at the beginning I didn't know why I was crying, because I have every reason to be happy, but it just felt so good.

sometimes, it really does hurt instead. we have the reasons to be happy, but the negative things come up and we just can't take it anymore.

I've seen so many things happen that don't compare to others, but are still awful. and at times it feels like I'm not even related to the people that are my family (oh my, did I just say that? I don't give a damn actually). everyday my eyes are opened to more evil that surrounds me every single day. satan just finds his way into everyone's lives and knows how disguise himself as the angel of light. I'm just so incredibly thankful that I can tell the difference most times.

that's who I try to be each day. and if it means saying some things that will hurt people (because they're so brutally honest) so be it. it's time we all face reality, and learn from our mistakes and what life hands us. I'm tired of hiding behind lies and just taking what people say about others. it's time we stand for what we believe, and help others find it too.

p.s.
sorry if this doesn't make sense and kind of touches on everything and nothing, I just needed to write this.